A Moment That Changed My Life Essay

This is my nonional essay for the Film Program at NYU. The prompt was Introduce yourself. quarter an unfor gettable til nowt in your life and how it changed your perception of yourself or the understand of some angiotensin converting enzyme close to you. This levelt can be dramatic and/or comedic. The assignment may be written as a dead story in the first person or as an essay. My one fear is that my essay is unverbalized to understand. So all feedback on how it reads to new(prenominal) pile would be a huge help. And also any gramatical errors or anything like that that you find would be a help as well.Im probably mailing this out to twenty-four hour period so please, any advice would be much appriciated. Thanks. How did I get here? How did this happen. I sit down staring th clumsy the open car door as it dangled at that place in front of my shopping malls. How had I not considern it to begin with how had it neer caught my eye? It hit me so fast, like a wave that un expectedly all overtakes you as you walk along the beach. Its originally happening, I thought to myself. I am no yearner a child. I am terrified. And its not fear that troubles me, its realization. Its the realization that my life forget apparently just keeps moving along and I learn no say in the matter.Its the realization that I no longer have what seems like all the prison term in the world to physique out what I ask to do with that life what I want to be, what I want to leave behind after Im gone. Its last(a)ly measure for me to stop cerebration just alternatively go out and do the things Ive dreamed of the things Ive unaccompanied wondered at, baffled at, as I lay alone in my rump at night. It had never felt real until now. I stared at it as it hung there, as it hung unaware of the meaning it gave to me at this moment. Those few seconds stretched for hours, stretched to encompass the get across of a lifemagazine in the scud of a blinking eye.And thats what it all now felt like a blink, a moment, a flash. Is that what it result feel like at the end? A flash? When I was a little girl, my aim took me to the fair. He bought me a bangle so that I could go on all of the rides without having to fumble with tickets. He t grizzly me, Darling, you can do anything you want here, just say the word. To a little child, hearing those words was like world given the keys to the world being given complete freedom. To me, freedom was a precious thing. I want it desired it above all else.But you see, in my eyes, freedom was simply having whatever you want, when you want, and not having to do anything you dont want to get it. In my eyes, freedom was a perfect world, but only for me. Of incline over condemnation I was persuaded from these views by opening my eyes to the hard work and responsibility involved in having freedom. As I grew fourth-year I earned more privileges. I worked to make my own money, began driving, anchor myself a wonderful boy , and even began preparing for college dreaming of going out on my own and making a name for myself in this wide world.And for a while the illusion was indeed convincing. I allowed myself to believe that over time I would gain more underwrite in my life and that that control would one mean solar day become positive. But it was still just an illusion, a dream an idea of a perfect world, my perfect world. Eventually I would realize that the one thing which I thought could bring me my absolute freedom is the one thing that depart forever hold it back. duration. Time is the one thing which binds everyone. Even the most wealthy, most powerful people in the world will die someday.Do you think they chose that for themselves? Do you think they wouldnt change it if they could? You could have the whole world in the palm of your hand, but the reality remains everyone is born, everyone grows older, and everyone will eventually die. Our time is limited. That cant be changed, just accepted. So staring, I sit down as it hung limply outside the open car door. How had I never seen it before? How had it never caught my eye? How had it all happened so fast? The lines, those fine cracks, they hung in general together over the weakened bone below.I sit down staring, staring at my fusss aged hand that hung at his side as he stood outside the car conversing with someone who, at the moment, held no importance to me. Never before had I noticed those lines, those cracks, those wrinkles which allot out like ripples on the surface of a pond. Never before had I noticed how thin the skin appeared, how stretched, or even how loosely the veins spread underneath. For the first time I was looking at my father a man in his fifties, hardened by years of unceasing working.For the first time in a long time, I was eyesight what was actually there and not just what my eyes were telling me to see based off of what they had previously known. For the first time, I realized I was growing up . For the first time, I felt the hold that time has on me. For the first time, I thought I am almost 18 years old. What have I do with that time? What had I done? I hated the thought. I dreaded the question. That question to which my answer would deliver of zipper of importance.At this time, what troubled me most was not the fact that I and everyone around me were getting older. At this time, what troubled me most was the fact that- in all that time of growth- the things which I had done served no greater finding than to merely entertain to entertain myself or the requests of others, teachers, my parents. I thought, Has all this time been wasted? Time goes by so fast faster than even I can sometimes realize. The funny thing is, the older I get, as the years I have left steadily decrease, I cant help feeling times smasher increase.And this only leads me to further wonder if these eighteen years have gone by so rapidly, as if they were nothing, will it not feel as though tom orrow I will find myself an old cleaning lady? Is it so unlikely? Is it so unlikely that, if the lifestyle I have I keep, I will wake up on that day and again have to question if the time I had been given had been bony away in futile activity? A sad day it would be to lay in remembrance of your life and realize that the eld you have spent held no purpose or meaning beyond to merely serve yourself and your own selfish comforts.A sad day it would be to realize that you have lived your life well and comfortably, yes, but never with purpose. And it was then, for a moment, that I was torn from my thoughts as my father at detain settled back into the car and began to drive us home. I looked over at the man who had given me everything my life, my childhood, and now this much needed revelation. unknown to him, in an instant, he had changed my views of this world and of the life I was leading. In an instant, he had given me what was needed for me to stop waiting around, stop simply think ing of how my life will be, and start living, actually living.In that moment, in that rough weathered hand, I saw my future. I saw the effects that time would one day have on me. I saw the old age that would one day overtake me. I saw myself upon that final hour, laying, awaiting that final breath. But what I did not see was how I would acknowledge that end. Would it be with peaceful acceptance or mournful detest? The real question is when that final hour comes, when I take that final breathe, will the death that takes me be taking a soul that has truly lived? testament I have truly lived? I sit, looking at my fathers hand as he steers us home.I sit, not hoping for, but planning the things I am going to do, the things which I will do, today and tomorrow and all the days after. The things which will, in purpose, serve greater causes than to just simply allow me to go on drifting along in my life. For from now on I will do nothing but dream and create. I will do nothing but share wi th others my thoughts, my words, my ideas. I will do nothing but pass with all I have to make a difference in, if even in the smallest way, the life of another, the ways of a people, the turning of the world. From now on I will nothing but truly just live.